This for the men who laugh too loud
when the room goes quiet and dark,
the ones who say “I’m sound, mate,”
with a riot in their heart.
The ones who fix everybody else
while their own head starts to split,
who carry people through their mess
then go home and sit in it.
We’re raised on “man up”, “don’t cry”,
“keep moving”, “don’t be weak”,
so we bury half our lives
behind the teeth we never speak.
I’ve been that bloke for years,
the wall people lean against,
solid on the outside,
inside all loose wires and dents.
I’ve helped others breathe again
because it made me feel worth saving,
stood strong in other people’s storms
while my own mind kept misbehaving.
I’ve worn the joker’s face,
made the room laugh through the ache,
because it’s easier being funny
than admitting you might break.
Then my brother went too quiet,
and that silence changed us all,
one man’s pain didn’t vanish,
it just landed when he fell.
That’s the bit they don’t tell you,
when you’re drowning in your head,
suicide don’t end the hurting,
it moves into the ones you left.
I’ve felt that grief in my ribs,
that guilt sat heavy at the door,
all the questions with no answers,
all the “could I have done more?”
And still I carried on,
because that’s what men are taught to do,
smile, nod, crack a joke,
while the cracks are showing through.
But listen, mate, I mean this,
and I’m not dressing it up nice,
if your head’s become a prison,
don’t make silence the price.
Talk before it gets too loud,
message someone, swear, fall apart,
you’re not less of a man
because you’ve got blood in your heart.
Being strong isn’t shutting up
until your chest caves in,
sometimes strength is saying,
“I’m not alright, where do I begin?”
So for the dads, the brothers,
the sons with tired eyes,
the men still saying “I’m fine”
while barely getting by,
I see you, because I am you,
still standing, still half wrecked,
still taking life on the chin
with a laugh stuck in my neck.
But I won’t let silence win,
not after what it cost,
because I know what stays behind
when a good man gets lost.
So speak, even if it shakes.
Cry, even if it burns.
Because the bravest thing a man can do
is come back before he turns.